Last Song

Walked around aimlessly, wandering
My faint breath, just showing white in the air
The meaninglessness of the seasons going by
Brought on the tears, for no reason
"I still love you..."


The sadness that continues to fall
Changes to pure white snow
I kept looking to the sky
If now my wish reaches you, 
Before my body vanishes
Hold me tightly once more.


We hurt each other so many times
Unable to understand one another
Even then you were always kind, 
Engraved in the ring you sprung upon me, 
Our promise remains unfulfilled
"Even now, I remember... "


My memories getting farther away from me, 
Always so bright, I wanted to stay with you longer.
We can never see each other again but, 
You always were there for me, 
I pray you never change... 


I can't rid myself of the final tears you showed me


Even if I disappear with this white snow
I want to bloom in your heart forever


Never forget the warmth, 
Of when we were nestled close, holding one another
Even when you're loving someone else
I'll never let go of your voice as I heard it the last time.
I want to fall into a deep sleep.


The sadness that continues to fall
Changes to pure white snow
I kept looking to the sky
If now my wish reaches you, 
Before my body vanishes
Hold me tight once more.


'Hold me tight once more...' 

You, My Dear Past..

To : My Dearest "E"

Do you still remember me?

When we first met in another world?

Do you still remember my name when you always call me?

I still remember you.

Even until now.

I remember when we first met.

You always call me Miu

I always call you Silvance.

We always together that time, we laugh and happy together.

We've hunt together, help each other.

You introduce me with your friends.

I smiled. I laugh.

To make you happy, to make you comfortable at my side.

You're so friendly and kind.
Too much.

I was so happy that I know you.

You always accompany me wherever and whenever you are.

Your friends are awesome too.

But I realize, it was just about 5 years ago.

I'm just a little child that didnt know anything

I still have a great ego and foolish that time

And you're too good for me.

We're not in same age.
We're not in same place.

I introduce myself named Eva Brawn

And you introduce yourself named "E".

What a beautiful name.

What I made is not my real name.

I wear a jester mask.

You wear your most honestly mask.

I was securing my true identity.

I dont want to be known as a child.

Then I decided to act like a grown up girl.

To be fit to your side.

But you, you tell me everything.

That makes me so sad.

I'm desperately in love with you.

And I think you too, that time.

But I decided not to have a relationship.

I dont want to hurt someone.
But, I realize I've already do.

I'm the mysterious girl.

You're the honest boy.

I'm so sad inside my heart.

I've been so lied to you from the beginning.

I'm a great liar.

I always do.

After all we've been through.

At last, you know the truth.
You gonna see things you might now wanna see.
Still not easy for me.

You discover something you dont know.

Something so mysterious about me you must know
You look beyond the lies, that you've already known.

I know all of this gonna happen, soon.

I just dont ready, and I dont act anything.

You know the real me.

My real identity.

Not all, but enough to make you disappointed so badly

You're so disappointed.

And I'm too scared.

To look and face you.

So I ran away, I sealed myself under the dark.
 Far away from you.
Loud voice of scream.
Tears in my eyes.
Look at me, now do you see?
Welcome to my world of lies.
Actually I dont wanna hide any part of me from you.

I finally face my most fearsome day.

I cried, I scared, I screaming.

I'm regret about one thing.

Why didnt I just leave you when we're not desperately in love?

I make my biggest mistakes.

I make my own sins.
I'm standing here with much of apologies.
But yet, such a beautiful release you inside of me.

You're too good for me.

And you've been ruined by me.

5 years ago memories cant leave my life.

I deserved this sins in me.

Though I regret it.

But I feel something that is so beautiful.

Feeling that pure love.

I'm happy I can feel that love, even in the end I feel suffer.

I have the most wonderful yet horrible memories.

And I deserved it, its my fault.

I  will stop creating some mask to cover my own self.

I want to be honest like you.

We're all exist, but our another world isnt.

Thank you for everything that you gave to me.

Thank you, you make me learn so much.

Honest and Love.

Can I ask you something?

Where do you go?

Did you finally has someone in your heart now?

If its true. She so lucky to have you.

You're the most gentle man I've ever met.

I hope I have a second chance.

To be honest to you and tell you everything about me.

My true form that I always hide it from you.

At least let me met you.

I'll ask for your forgiveness.

I'm so sorry for what I've been done to you.

And I thank you for everything that has been happening between you and me.

It was a wonderful days with you!

You're now disappear without a track.

I realize I cant hope much to met you.
Please, never mind was on the left.

O, someone who made this picture to me when my birth day comes.

I bit you goodbye.

I hope you are well with your new life without me.

Live happily.

I'm so sorry and thank you.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All of my memories lies in this picture. This is the last thing that can remind me of you.
I always remember, you really love the Forget-Me-Not Flowers and Sunflowers, and you love to edit picture like what you did to the Dream of Dolls and others.
Your detective skill is un-match-able. I hope you're graduated from your Law College and be what you wanna be.
I still listening the RAN musics like you always said and like, it was really a good music. You really have a good taste of music, do you? And do you still hate Michael Jackson? Please dont :")
I still remember your unique language. Your optimistic. Your bishounen face. And your name. It lies within me.

I still remember the game we've been played. Ragnarok Online.

RAMADHAN DAY!

Everyone, Ramadhan Day is coming closer...
And, I just gonna tell to the point that... I'm so sorry if I have a mistake to all of you, especially my friends, my family, my brothers and sisters, and all of you. Because, Ramadhan is so close, we need to forgive each other, and make Ramadhan Day more wonderful to all of Muslim.

And dont forget we need to always smile and happy. No need to be sad in this holy Ramadhan. We need to defend ourself, our body and our mind from evil. We need to get close each other, thats why we must  hospitality.

Lets celebrate this holy day in joy, happiness, laugh, smile, clean heart & mind.
We dont know if we can see Ramadhan in another year, so we must have a full spirit, dont waste anything or you'll feel disappointed.

Taqoballahu Minna Waminkum Taqoballahu Yaa Kariim  
Minal Aidzin Wal Faidzin
Please forgive any bad thoughts and actions

Happy Idul Fitri 1432 H Day!

New School!

Oh, I've been telling you about my graduation, do I?
Okay, now I'll tell you about my new school. Its not a famous school, nor a really great school. Just a regular school, but I think its a cool school.

The name of my school is SMK N 6 Yogyakarta (High School)
Okay, the first day in this school its kinda creepy though, I dont have a friend in the first place, not yet. But when the seniors place the students in their groups/class, I get to know many friends!
I think, here in my school, they have a lovely friends. Cause in the first day, they're all so lovely to me!

I'm relieved, first, I hate the first day of school. Its creepy! But seriously, really. After all happened to me, I'm happy enough. I love here so much!
So, the first day of school, the seniors give us kinda challenge. Its a normal challenge, every first day of school, the seniors always do give us a challenge, its called MOS. But this is my first time. They tell us to make something ridiculous! Like a weird name tag, and a weird note book. Not just that! Its just the beginning. The seniors tell us to make and bring some weird lunch food. I dont know for what, cause I never have a challenge by the seniors before, cause my old junior high school is a peace school. Peace? HAHA, give me a break -_- Sorry, I'm just kidding :P

After the weird lunch food, they give us another challenge, we must buy something weird too, like a Serai tree and Cengkeh tree in minimum height 60cm, its so hard to look this tree. And then we must brought a Sweet Little Finger cookie and a What It Is cookie. I dont even know what is that cookie! I've never seen that!

Then we must go to the school so early in the morning, but I think I kinda lucky, my school not make us to go really early like another school :P
And next is we must obey some rules, and again, more weird rules. But everyone I know say that if you not go to the Challenge Day in school, you'll never feel the real school it is. So, when I heard that, I really tried to understand and do it. But its kinda hard, I feel so lazy, and then again I must be patient, I want to feel my real high school day!

This Is It!

Now I'll show some of my graduation photos. Hope everyone like it.
Sorry about the photos. Its kinda crazy, I know...

 

This is me, with all of my best friends :)